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Taking the ‘F’ word off the table

No, not that ‘F’ word!! The ‘Failure’ word. How often have you tried something and thrown up your hands in despair after ‘failing’ to achieve it first time? How many times have you thought you were stupid, inept, or similar in these situations? And how did that leave you feeling? I’m guessing, not great.

Society today is driven by ‘Results, Results, RESULTS!’ and it is costing many of us dearly. This results focus creates a kind of ‘sh!t or bust’ mentality where if we don’t succeed first time, we fail. Or worse still, we brand ourselves a ‘failure’ and what follows is lots of negative self-talk and put downs.


When we fall into this win or lose mentality we up the stakes and that can increase our perception of pressure, or even stress in what we are trying to achieve. We focus so intently on the outcome, we forget to pay attention to the process, what we are learning and what we could learn, if only we choose to be present in each moment leading to that outcome.

We’ve all seen it – the results obsession in our school system, the pages of graphs showing business performance (and none of the context), the ever growing frustration that the number on the scales is resolutely refusing to move despite our new healthy eating regime. This results focus can leave us feeling that we have no control over these things and can create disillusionment and even depression or anxiety.

We see celebrities branded as ‘overnight successes’ and business leaders who appear to pop up out of nowhere and we wonder what we are doing wrong. I remember reading an interview with ‘overnight fitness guru’ Joe Wicks who spoke of his frustration at this label, and the ten hard years of work to get where he got. But we don’t see that. Hard work and effort isn’t glamourous, it isn’t sexy and it doesn’t sell us stuff we don’t need.



When we choose to approach life and all its challenges with a mindset of growth, learning and enjoying the ride, when we take the ‘F’ word off the table, we can be open to having more fun in what we do, to making new discoveries about the world around us and ourselves, to not getting it right first time and figuring out what to do differently to improve our chances of success next time.

We develop new skills, build resilience and have a helluva lot more fun along the way. So, I’m taking the ‘F’ word off the table.

If you’d like to find out how to nurture your growth mindset get in touch today to arrange your free consultation:

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